election ‘08

election ‘08

Originally uploaded by l@in.

I definitely prefer the paper ballot.

recovery – day 5

day 5

Originally uploaded by l@in.

Recovery has been both better and worse than I anticipated. I think I already mentioned that the implant was removed (and reinserted!), which resulted in the increased level of pain that I’m experiencing. And again, the drain didn’t help (although, I know not having it could have been disastrous.) However, I am feeling better quickly. My range of motion is pretty good and while I’m not trying to lift anything of any significance, I can pick up a glass or a plate in my left hand and carry it a short distance without an issue, which is nice. I’ve even been able to knit small projects! I listened to my Dr.’s exercise mantra, “you can walk”, and did 30 minutes on the treadmill today at a really slow pace. It’s better than nothing, and I’m so happy we were able to get that before the surgery.

I’ve done this enough that I feel like I kind of have a system. I try to do whatever I feel compelled to. If I feel like laying down, I do. If I feel like I need more pain meds I take them (and if what I feel I need seems unreasonable, I know there’s a problem). If I think I can tackle some house work I try and if it doesn’t hurt, I do it, and if it does – forget it. It really helps that I’ve been able to work from home this week, and can hang out with the laptop in bed if I need to.

And if I’m hungry, I eat. This is probably the most complicated thing for me because I do love to eat. I’m also trying to be healthy for many reasons, one of which is because I’m, of course, concerned about the cancer returning. So I try to eat healthy, exercise, and do all the things you’re supposed to do to stay in optimum health. Did I mention I love to eat? And I love sweets? I know when I’m exercising a lot, I feel like I can cut myself some slack, but now that I’m struggling with a 28 minute mile (ugh! it hurts just to type), I don’t really have that luxury. So I stocked the freezer with pasta sauce, chili, and soup, and Joanna has been great about getting me out of the house to find yummy healthy things with the occasional flake (like a delicious chocolate cake from whole foods). I am looking forward to being able to handle the damn blender again – I miss my green smoothies!

Chapter 7 – Wherein the author confesses her addiction to plastic surgery

So, I had another surgery today. My left implant seems to be encapsulating slightly. It’s certainly not terrible, but the changes have been noticeable over the past few months, prompting me to see my plastic surgeon. When I saw her she agreed that it looked as if there was some encapsulating going on and told me to wait , and come back in a few weeks to see if things seemed to progress, and they did.

So today I had a revision done to my reconstruction on the left side. Dr. Otero took out the implant, removed some skin, made a revision to the dent (seriously a dent developed around my armpit), and then popped the implant back in. I don’t think I realized that the implant would be taken in and out so I’m feeling a bit more rough than I expected to. And I have a drain, which I was hoping not to have but Dr. Otero said there was a lot of fluid in there, so better safe than sorry. Certainly better than an emergency drain insertion as I’ve had before and it can come out first thing Monday, which is great. Essentially one of my fake boobs needed a lift. WTF?

I didn’t have to spend the night, so I’m home. Joanna is on a prescription run. I feel pretty rough and am in more pain than I expected, but I’m hoping the recovery will be speedy and the pain will dissipate quickly.

Tonight I’m going to watch Wife Swap, eat matzo, drink diet ginger ale, and pill pop. I’m hoping for a weekend of movies and bad tv on cable. Pedestrian as it is, I am okay with that.

Another year…

Herb Garden

Originally uploaded by l@in.

Last Friday was my birthday. I was supposed to go out and have a night of it, but I just was not up for it. Maybe it’s age (I am now officially into my 30s), or maybe I’m just boring, but I like to think of it as just another step in the process of listening to myself a little better and trying to pay attention to what I actually want and need to do. Baby steps, you know? But it was a super nice weekend, full of good food, and good wine, and really low key fun.

Saturday we went out to dinner at my favorite deli, and afterword I treated myself to some local hiking and camping books. I don’t think I’ll manage to get in a camping excursion this year, but at least I can be ready for spring and do some local hiking. Today we went to the National Arboretum, which I’ve never been to and it was pretty awesome. We only ran around about 1/3 of it, but I can’t wait to go back.

Sometimes I really love being in DC. I mean we went to this amazing park, that’s right in town, and totally free. And there’s so much to do, and explore, if you want. DC drives me nuts, too but overall, I’m not sure if there’s a place right now that I’d rather be. So, I’m 31. I’m happy with where I am both literally and figuratively. Who knew?

unexpected guests

Today I left work early as I had a bunch of reading to do to prepare for a meeting tomorrow and hate doing that at my desk. My plan was get home, start some chili and read as it cooked. I arrived home about the same time as school was getting out. As I was about to unlock my door, two elementary school-aged kids from a few doors down walked over and asked if they could come in. The kids always ask about Oliver and the turtles because they can seem them through the window, so I assumed that they wanted to come in and attempt to play with Oliver. I told them, not today and moved towards the house. Then the little girl, said, “Our mom’s not home.” I looked at her brother who was walking decidedly towards me, and said, “Really?” He smiled and said no. “…and we don’t have a key.” Great. I asked if there was anyone else at home, and of course there wasn’t. “Well, let’s go inside!” I told them.

So there I was, needing to do work, planning on making dinner and was now host to two elementary school kids for an indefinite amount of time. As they ran into the house I tried to remember if there was anything laying around that shouldn’t be and played out disaster scenarios in my head like if their mom didn’t come home until late and I’d have to feed them vegetarian chili and they found it disgusting and I had to take them to McDonald’s or their mom would freak out when she got home because her kids were in a stranger’s house.

I only had to keep an eye on the kids for 20 minutes or so. During that time I gave the little boy a glass of milk and followed him around the house while he drank it and balanced a too-big-for-his-hands glass in just one hand as he tried to pet Oliver, and not trip over my yoga mat, and my running shoes, and the mail. They watched the Disney channel, called their mom on my cell phone, successfully petted Oliver a few times before he wisely retreated upstairs, “Can I go get him?” they asked, “Um…let’s not.”, harassed the turtles, ran the bathroom sink over and trailed armfulls of bubbles over the wood floors.

Altogether, they’re well-behaved kids. I learned that everyone at school has a cell phone and they use it all the time and found out where all the elementary schools are in our neighborhood. I was glad that they ran into me before they had to hang out on their porch until their mom came home or had to knock on every neighbors door until they found someone home, even with as safe as our neighborhood is. But honestly, they wore me out a little bit. In retrospect, had I realized that they were going to leave so quickly I should have stuffed them full of ice cream and soda and sent them on their way.

help me choose shoes

cute or not?

Originally uploaded by l@in.

These just arrived today and I can’t decide whether they’re keepers. They’re bright blue patent leather. The feel good on, but I’m concerned that the leather is a bit cheap, especially considering that near one heal on the underside there is a big “chip” out of the leather.

Should I keep them, or can I do better?

Thanks!

weekend round-up

Honestly, it’s been difficult to strike a balance between getting things done in the house and taking some time to just chill out and enjoy the summer. This weekend, though, I think we came close to hitting the mark. Friday we went out and tried Sakana in Dupont and then saw Woody Allen’s new film. The sushi was actually quite good, and the oyster roll was excellent. The film was not quite what I expected, but was hilarious. If you get a chance, you should see it. Saturday we went and picked out a treadmill to replace our gym membership, then we finished painting the bedroom. It is a really gorgeous shade of blue now. Today we did the trim after hitting the Takoma Park farmer’s market and having brunch at Mark’s Kitchen. An indulgence, I’m almost embarrassed to say, we’ve succumbed to for the past three Sunday mornings. I also ran into an old college friend while looking for melon’s which was a nice surprise.

So, now the first round of improvements to the house are really finished. Time to unpack, put the books on the shelves, mow the damn lawn, and find some patio furniture so we can finally enjoy that deck we were so excited about.

Old News

new house

Originally uploaded by l@in.

You’ve probably figured it out already, but last month Joanna and I bought our first house. We started looking right around the time we returned from Israel, and as a result we’ve been pretty busy and droped off the face of the Earth (sorry!). By the time we moved in, I’d say we were pretty house-fatigued.

But now we are almost done with our initial round of improvements which will facilitate the last of the boxes being unpacked. I suspect we’ll be done with the painting this weekend.

Oliver, shy little guy that he is, loves the house more than we expected. He tears up and down the stairs and often chooses to sleep on a patch of hardwood floor instead of crawling into bed with us. We miss him. Hopefully the novelty will wear off. We’re mattress shopping, so perhaps the allure of something new (and cushy) will lure him back to bed.

Just wanted to update, and rejoin the world. Hello! Now back to important things, like Olympic beach volleyball. Go May-Treanor/Walsh!

What I Learned from Clinton’s Campaign

clinton speech

Originally uploaded by l@in.

Today, Joanna and I met up with a friend to go see Hillary Clinton’s final campaign speech at the National Building Museum. We waited in the hot June sun with hundreds of others snaking around the building until we finally got inside. Fortunately we didn’t have to wait in the heat for too long, though we couldn’t see much from the second floor. We did hear the applause for Terry McAuliffe as he arrived and joked amongst ourselves that perhaps Bill had stopped off for a snack at the Burger King nearby as we watched the clock and waited.

Clinton is great speaker. She certainly did not disappoint today as she managed to address the disappointment of her supporters, the historic nature of her campaign, the need for full inclusion in the Democratic Party, and throw her full support under Barak Obama as the presidential nominee in a concise and eloquent manner.

I won’t lie, I’m genuinely sad that she didn’t get the nomination. I believe she is the best candidate for the job. I am also sad that this election will not send the first woman to the White House in a position other than First Lady.

I am, however, heartened by her speech. In hearing it live, as well as having time to reflect while awaiting her arrival I realized that there are important take-aways from her campaign. These points are especially pertinent to me as a woman. It’s difficult to explain, but I do feel that this election process has exposed the very serious cracks in the foundation our nation was built on. Sexism and racism are still present in our collective psyche. They are easy issues to ignore or try and overlook because they’re difficult to deal with. They’re messy, and personal, and emotional, but in order to really deal with them, one must do it head-on. It requires dialog both internal and external. There is no excuse for either, but I do feel as if sexism is easier to ignore. I heard a pundit on tv once I returned home this evening talking about how the idea of a glass ceiling was a “ridiculous” idea. Granted, the man was on Fox news, but I was still shocked that he said it. Shocked that he thought that was an okay comment to make as if months ago almost every news poll was asking the question if America was ready for a female President. They asked the question if we were ready for a black President too, and frankly I’m just kind of appalled that we’ve got to ask the question, even though it’s clear that we do, because we’re not sure about the answer.

Anyway, it’s a lot to process. Seeing Clinton speak this afternoon was inspiring to me. She was confident and gracious and conceded without being defeatist. I think it’s a good lesson. It got me thinking about what I might do to change my thinking about failures, both small and large, and how to work towards success in my own life. I came up with points made in Clinton’s speech today that I think would be helpful to me.

1. It’s okay to be proud and vocal about your accomplishments.

One of the first comments I heard about the speech today while watching the news was that she talked about herself a lot. My first thought was well… yeah, it was about her campaign. But then I really thought about it – she is able to talk about her own accomplishments without being self-aggrandizing. I think that’s important, especially for women, because I think we’re taught to down-play what we do and wait for someone else to congratulate us for our accomplishments, which ultimately, doesn’t do anyone any good.

2. Don’t stop just because other’s think you should.

People have been advocating that Clinton drop out of the race for months. If she had, we may never have seen just how much support was out there. I think it’s a good lesson in not giving up, trying your best, and having faith in yourself and your goals.

3. Just because you fight hard, doesn’t mean you’re going to win.

I think that sums it up. Along with this though, I think it’s easy to assume that because you didn’t win you weren’t good enough to win. In actuality, that’s not always the case.

4. Be thankful.

Clinton was thankful for the opportunity to run for President, for her supporters, her family and friends, and for the opportunities afforded her. It’s cheesy, but it’s easy to forget to be thankful.

5. Be gracious, exhibit grace.

Throughout the campaign, and even before really, I have always been a little amazed at Clinton’s graciousness. The speech she gave today must have been extraordinarily difficult, but she did it very well. I feel as if the ability to do this is born of a little hardship.

But that’s it. It was a good race. Now, time for a Democrat in the White House.

it’s the same, but different

Today is Blogging for LGBT family day.

For me, almost every issue of this nature is both personal and political and the two are ever intertwined. Currently in 31 states there are no legal protections if you’re fired because of your sexual orientation. In numerous states there is no second parent adoption. And yes, kiddies! Virginia is far, far from gay friendly. Usually if you’re not married and applying for a loan where there needs to be a credit check, each individual is required to pay whereas a married couple pays a single fee together. And if you’re gay and married, good luck with those federal taxes.

On a strictly personal level, referring to or not referring to your partner in the workplace is always a fun conundrum. Everyone else seems to have no issue bringing up their husbands, wives, children even when the context is completely inappropriate. Do you take your partner to the holiday party, the company picnic? What if you have kids?

On the upside, California finally did the right thing. New York inches in that direction. And it’s nice to have friends who email you about how cute you and your partner’s kids would be, and at the end of the email realizes – hey wait! You guys can’t have biological children. Because, to her my relationship is completely natural, and she wants to be an auntie.

There’s a great post on Queercents about traveling as a family. Pandagon also has a post up. Hopefully by the end of the day other big feminist blogs will post as well.