this shirt is incredible:

you can buy them from planned parenthood.

I want one.

  1. Anonymous said:

    ben: hahahahahaha, i want one… i’ll wear it in rotation.

  2. *deep breath* Ben, please do not ever do 2 things: 1) laugh at anything having to do with abortions. 2) Wear that shirt. You would deserve the severe beating you would get. Please grow up. Sorry to waste your space with this sarah but i had to say it.

  3. Anonymous said:

    Maybe I’m missing the point, but why is this cool?

  4. sarah said:

    i essentially think it’s cool because it’s something people don’t like to talk about. i think when bad and traumatizing situations aren’t discussed, then it’s easy to stigmatize the people who, “do bad things”, in this instance a woman who has had an abortion.

    the beauty of the slogan on this shirt is that it puts a face on a stigmatized experience. if tons of women wear these shirts, there are more real faces to associate with this experience, and suddenly the women having abortions are what they are already, real people who have had to make a difficult decision from all walks of life.

    the other thing i like about it is that anyone can wear one, even if a woman hasn’t had an abortion, it still adds to the de-stigmatization factor, in my opinion

  5. Anonymous said:

    I can relate to what you’re saying. However, I’m curious to know what you think about the possible relationship between a woman’s stigmatic (word?) feelings and the conflict that arises from guilt. The guilt that I’m talking about may have nothing to do with the stigma attached to it (maybe it is, that’s why I ask), but instead comes from the feelings that might arise in any parent that might kill their child. I’d hate to get into an argument about if a fetus is a child, but is it possible that a mother might have some sort of ‘connection’ with her spawn (for lack of a better term) resulting in an unnatural seperation anxiety from abortion? I’ve never read anything about this subject, but I have talked with people who have had abortions and most tend to hold some sort of guilt from the act. Sadly, I don’t know precisely where the source of it lies; but I tend to think there’s more to it than stigma alone.

  6. sarah said:

    first of all, i’ve never had an abortion. i would wear the shirt for the reasons that i’ve outlined earlier. i believe that until a unplanned pregnancy arises, no woman really knows what her desire in that situation would be (desire does not always dictate outcome, though thanks to paternalistic legal systems). that decision would probably be heavily dependent on the situation in which the pregnancy occurred, as well. therefore i can never ever say, i my mind that i would or would not have an abortion, hence the personal and somewhat selfish desire for the “you’re automatically a bad person” if you’ve had an abortion.

    that said, the numerous woment that i’ve spoken with who have had an abortion, and those that i have heard speak in public all have different reactions – that’s the process of human response. Some women do feel guilty, terribly guilty. And that level of guilt, I believe is based on a continuum, from (on a scale of greatest to least):

    5) genuinely wishing they could reverse their decision, 4) lesser guilt with resolve. the idea that they wish that the outcome of the pregnancy could have been different, however they felt it was the right thing to do
    3) a sense of loss, little guilt
    2) saddness, little guilt
    1) no guilt

    I have met women who have had abortions on every spot in the continuum.

    as for a mother having a natural, special connection to a child that has lived inside of her body, or maternal instinct – i don’t believe in it. I do think that there is a connection – which is love. The belief in maternal instinct, i believe, leads to the belief that a father’s relationship to a child will never be as great or deep, or the same as a mother’s relationship to a child. that i don’t buy and feel that it serves as an excuse for a patriarchal society. i.e., women have a natural bond to their children, they are the only appropriate caretaker. i do believe that there is a deep and intense connection between any parent and child – and that’s the phenomenon of love. love is often attributed to vulnerability and weakness, also in my opinion why women are pegged as having a greater capacity to love being a part of the foundation of a
    patriarchal society as well.

    where i believe that the stigma comes in to play is the way that it exacerbates any natural feelings of guilt or loss a woman might already have, thereby creating an unnatural sense of guilt or loss. i have read a lot of media where women don’t express guilt until they have been presented with exaggerated pictures of aborted fetuses, been told that they were murderers by family, friends, protesters, etc. while it might not be the source of all negative feelings about the experience, the stigma and all the causes of that stigma do play a large role in personal feelings.

    frontline did a great segment on abortion in the 80s and you can watch it online.

  7. Anonymous said:

    Yeah! And what about Scarecrow’s brain!?


  8. Anonymous said:

    Oh, BTW… I think it is permissable to joke about ANY issue, particularly if that joking helps the people with an emotional stake vent frustration, understand their position better, or whatever.

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