i’m still catching up from being internet-less and out of town. in reading over the last week or so of atrios, i came across this post from Mathew Gross, written by Mel Giles. It is brilliant, and along the lines of what i’ve been thinking for about 4 years now. It’s nice to see someone else say it. I want to see academic papers from those in sociology and psychology, though. too bad that i couldn’t use something similar as a diss topic.
Watch Dan Rather apologize for not getting his facts straight, humiliated before the eyes of America, voluntarily undermining his credibility and career of over thirty years. Observe Donna Brazille squirm as she is ridiculed by Bay Buchanan, and pronounced irrelevant and nearly non-existent. Listen as Donna and Nancy Pelosi and Senator Charles Schumer take to the airwaves saying that they have to go back to the drawing board and learn from their mistakes and try to be better, more likable, more appealing, have a stronger message, speak to morality. Watch them awkwardly quote the bible, trying to speak the new language of America. Surf the blogs, and read the comments of dismayed, discombobulated, confused individuals trying to figure out what they did wrong. Hear the cacophony of voices, crying out, “Why did they beat me?”
And then ask anyone who has ever worked in a domestic violence shelter if they have heard this before.
They will tell you, every single day.
The answer is quite simple. They beat us because they are abusers. We can call it hate. We can call it fear. We can say it is unfair. But we are looped into the cycle of violence, and we need to start calling the dominating side what they are: abusive. And we need to recognize that we are the victims of verbal, mental, and even, in the case of Iraq, physical violence…
— Mel Giles, from the Mathew Gross blog, on 11/7/04
the one thing that this post doesn’t address is that the most dangerous period in a cycle of domestic violence is when a survivor of leaves their abuser, because then the abuser has nothing to lose. i’m not sure how this translates to the present national situation, but it has to be relevant in some manner. More information on domestic violence can be found at the site for Middle Way House